The Chronic(what!)les of Narnia

I feel it's my duty to tell everyone that the musical scores for both of the Narnia movies are amazing. Even if Narnia isn't your thing (haters), if you like good instrumental stuff, check them out. I've been listening to them constantly for a few years now.

Continue reading...

Shear Genius: Season Finale

Yes, yes. I watch Shear Genius. I'm not proud of it. But I will blog for the finale, because, well, why not.

My favorite was Daniel, but he went home last week (also, Daniel on PR went home last week. Conspiracy?). Now I want Nicole to win, but it's not very likely since Dee (bitch) seems like a better stylist, but also, Charlie (bitch) is a bit better, too. Daniel was where it's at. Plus he wasn't a douche bag. Even Jaclyn shed a tear when he left.

I really like Rene Fris. It sounds like he has to try so hard to say everything because he talks so slowly. It's charming, though.

Wow, three hours to cut, color, and style 4 different hairstyles? What a ridiculous challenge.

lol @ Charlie saying he would buy his boyfriend a nose job if he won the money.

Man, what the hell is with Dee's models not letting her cut any hair length? Isn't it like a prerequisite that the models are open to these things? Plus, they're so selfish they won't take a small change in order for one person to achieve their lifelong dream? Sad.

This is for real so crazy. Four people in 3 hours? Talk about ridiculous timing and multitasking.

Oh my God, so ridiculous. It looks like no one came close to finishing, but maybe that's just the editing. Probably not though. I really wanna see the runway.

Sweet! Daniel is fan favorite! I'm glad for him. At least he got $10,000.

Dee: 18 looks bad. 30 looks awful and unfinished. 45 looks decent, but nothing special. 60 just looks scary. I really don't like any of Dee's final cuts.

Charlie: 18 looks pretty great. 30 doesn't look the best, but it looks finished. 45 looks like a solid hairdo, but not right for that lady. 60 looks like Nicole's haircut.... And Nicole isn't a 60 year-old.

Nicole: 18 looks good. Simple, but good. 30 looks pretty good, but again, kind of simple. 45 is... blonde? Pretty great haircut, though. 60 actually looks pretty good, but unfinished.

I don't think Dee should win at all. I think Charlie's was the best, but Nicole is my favorite and I hope she wins....

As corney as Dee and Charlie's stories were, at least they had spirit. Nicole's was pretty boring and everyday, though. At least it was personal, I guess.

Wow, 48% of the voters think Nicole should be Shear Genius? Surprising.

Aww, God damnit. Nicole is called out first. F this show. Her cuts were better than Dee's.

What the FUCK. Dee is the winner? I hate Shear Genius. Yet another reason why this show is stupid. Not watching next season the end.

Continue reading...

Project Runway: Two Episodes

So I watched last week's episode, but I watched it late because I was out of town. It was an okay episode. No real comments, other than I hate Chris March.

This episode is an interesting challenge.

For the record, I like: LeAnne, Kenley (her model dropping out is kind of BS), Jerell, and Terri. Blayne is all right.

Keith needs to shut up. Yeah, it sucks that she had to sit down, but don't make garments that fragile. Or have her wear something else while she gets hair and makeup done. Stop with the attitude.

Shit, Nina Garcia is missing? Damnit.

Runway time:

GOOD: Terri, LeAnne, Suede
MEH: Jerell (great garment, but looks odd on his model), Kenley , Korto, Stella (not bad, but the vest looks bland)
BAD: Keith, Blayne (top is a mess/not fit), Joe (good thing you have immunity)

Too many seatbelts for this challenge, in my opinion.

What, Heidi? Breaking a mirror is "seven years no sex?" I thought it was "seven years bad luck." Must be the German version.

LeAnne's looks so gorgeous. So does her model. I love this outfit. If she doesn't win I'm choking someone.

Thank you Michael Kors for telling Keith to suck it up. Anyone who goes out to the public will be judged, and there will always be demeaning comments. Learn to take it like a professional.

YES! So glad LeAnne won. Looooove her product, and she's so good. Will post pictures later (don't want to go to the Bravo website for fear of spoiling the Shear Genius finale).

Keith is out. Not hard to see that one coming. His garment was pretty awful and he has a shit attitude. Again, will post picture later.

Let's go next week!

Continue reading...

Quantum of Solace

Here's a trailer for the upcoming James Bond 22, Quantum of Solace. You're welcome.



A lot of James Bond has been on television lately, but the recent Casino Royale is definitely one of -- if not the -- best. It was one of my favorite films of 2006, and hopefully this sequel will be just as good. A new director, yes, but Marc Forster is very capable and the writing staff is the same as Casino Royale.

Definitely opening weekend material.

Continue reading...

Vicky Cristina Barcelona

Vicky Cristina Barcelona

Woody Allen is at his best not necessarily in Manhattan, but at least when he tries to break the norm of story, or structure, or both. When he's good, he's really good (Match Point, Annie Hall, The Purple Rose of Cairo, etc.), and when he's not so ambitious it's a complete drag (Cassandra's Dream, Hollywood Ending, Anything Else, etc.). Vicky Cristina Barcelona (henceforth known as VCB) falls into the latter category.

I like to think that 'even a bad Woody Allen film is still pretty good.' Yes. True, but only when he's also acting as the neurotic we've all come to know and love. When he's not actually in his films the bar is much higher.

VCB is a drama about two girls with opposite outlooks on love (Vicky is in love with being in love, while Cristina "isn't exactly hard to maneuver into the sack."). They are both approached by Juan Antonio (Javier Bardem), who proposes a weekend vacation and some three-way action. He's rich, charming, and holds a power over women -- including his ex-wife, who he still loves, and who love him. The movie funnels to a three-way relationship, all right. It's just between Juan Antonio, Cristina, and his ex-wife (Penelope Cruz as Maria Elena).

The fundamental problem with the film is the excessive use of narration. Woody Allen has chosen to tell, not show, and that is a elementary mistake in storytelling. Yes, it cuts down the film's runtime considerably, but I would much rather learn about the characters by observing them, as opposed to being told how they feel and why they feel it.

The most interesting aspect of the film is Vicky, and her relationship with Juan Antonio. They are exactly the opposite of one-another, and as Paula Abdul sings, Opposites Attract. Vicky tries to fight it, but we can all see how they are still similar, the least of which is that Vicky plans to be wed (and does become so), while Juan Antonio also was once married. Marriage is not something Cristina plans to think about for a long time, and because of that, perhaps Vicky is the better match for Juan Antonio than she thinks.

But the film cuts too much out and explains to us trivial plot elements that we couldn't care less about. Woody Allen doesn't seem to know what he wanted to accomplish with this movie (other than a tour of Barcelona and various other Spanish regions). I feel that he was on the right track, but just as we begin to develop feelings for the characters, we're cut off. Disappointing, and hopefully his next trip to Europe is more poignant.

Rating: 4/7

Continue reading...

Ignorance Talks a Big Talk

I don't mind a little jab here or there at people, places, or things (nouns, really). Sometimes feigning ignorance is done for comedic purposes or for satire, but lately it seems like a lot of people have been criticizing the women's vault finals. Primarily the fact that Cheng Fei got the Bronze medal instead of Alicia Sacramone.

Here is an example, which I saw linked to on the Yahoo! home page.

Look, I don't know much about gymnastics, but I do know that landing a vault on two feet is better than landing one on two knees. Olympic gymnastics judges evidently disagree with me, as they awarded China's Cheng Fei a bronze medal yesterday even after she fell on her vault landing. American Alicia Sacramone finished fourth despite, you know, not falling.

Yes, landing on your feet is better than having some knee touch the ground. But landing is not the only thing taken into consideration during a vault. Other than the obvious start value and execution, the vault is actually graded on an average of two scores, and anyone who watched the whole event can tell you Cheng Fei easily had the best first vault of the finals. People forget that part.

Wikipedia has the details, but to summarize: Cheng Fei scored a 16.075 on her first vault, and when averaged with her poor 15.050 on her second vault, gave her a better score than Alicia's. People don't notice that Fei did get an 8.550 on her execution, it was simply that her vault was much harder (6.5 against a 5.8) than Alicia's that saved her.

So basically, Cheng did phenomenal on a hard vault, and bad on a hard vault, and together those beat out Alicia doing good on a hard vault and good on a moderate vault. I'm all about America, but I don't think this is the scoring battle to fight.

Continue reading...

Lucky Number Slevin is Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang Lite

I finally got around to watching Lucky Number Slevin tonight, and let's say I'm glad I did not see it in theaters. Not because I would have paid for it, but because I would have been filled with frustration as some of the slower audience members justify the movie spelling everything out in big bright neon signs.

The first hour or so of the movie had me going. Maybe some people don't dig on the sort of obsessive, wordy dialogue used here, but I do. This movie had an interesting setup, with a bit of North by Northwest feel (which is sadly acknowledged in the movie itself). Yet there was a sort of wit that reminded me very much of Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang, which came out roughly a year earlier.

The real problems with Slevin come in what should be the third act. The gimmick of the movie can be figured out --spoilers ahead--.....

....when Slevin shoots the Fairy twice in the chest with perfect aim. Maybe even sooner. If we put a little thought into it, the whole thing would make sense and the holes could be filled in by ourselves; however, the writer does not give his audience enough credit and insists on explaining everything that we've already seen the result of. We do not need to see Bruce Willis striking deals with both sides, or him punching Slevin in the nose. What we needed was a solid third act, escalating the story as opposed to simply backpedaling through the first act. That's a tragic mistake of movies that try to have a 'twist,' and it pains me to see it.

For that, I give this movie a 5 out of 7, and that's generous. Do yourself a favor and watch Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang instead.

Continue reading...

Gymnastics Tiebreakers are Stupid

Why can't two gold medals be awarded in gymnastics? Nastia Liukin tied the score of one of those (supposedly) 16 year-old Chinese girls in the uneven bars, but because of some technicality got placed second.

I feel really bad for her -- but at least she won the individual all-around. That makes me feel a bit better.

Continue reading...

Clark's Chemistry

I think we can all comfortably say that Clark Gable is one of -- if not the -- best actor of all time. Yet what I've noticed is that, despite all his talent, there rarely seems to be chemistry between him and his on-screen love interest.

Tonight I watched The Misfits, which was the last performance of both Clark Gable and Marilyn Monroe. The film lacked the wit and clutch hold classics from the 1960s had, and instead is just a slight step down memory lane. There are a few problems with this film, primarily why the 35 year-old Marilyn Monroe, a kind-hearted city girl, would choose to end the movie with the 60 year-old Clark Gable, who is a cowboy at heart and only wants the thrill of catching horses and selling them to be made into dog food. Sure, at the end of the film we get some 'realizations,' but it seems Marilyn would have been much better off with the great Montgomery Cliff, who seems to understand her far better than Clark ever would. But Gable had the higher billing, so he gets the girl.

Let's go back to a younger Gable. Everyone should have seen It Happened One Night, which is arguably one of the best films of all time. Here Gable was 33 years-old, and his co-star Claudette Colbert was 29, which is much more reasonable. Here, Gable's lack of chemistry is what makes the film all that more believable, because until the very last minutes we don't know what he'll do. But can we imagine Gable simply sweeping Claudette Colbert off her feet like, perhaps, Cary Grant or Jimmy Stewart? I cannot.

In perhaps Gable's best performance, his Rhett Butler in Gone with the Wind, again his detachment from the women species plays out perfectly. How great, his closing line, "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." One of the best lines of all time. Would a softer-looking man be able to get away with that? No. We would laugh, thinking, "Yes, you do." We would wait for Vivien Leigh to shut the door, and then to hear a knock ten seconds later, like in so many other movies of that era.

Another perfect performance for this is Mutiny on the Bounty, where there are almost no women in the entire film (correct me if I'm wrong -- I haven't seen this film in a while). With that, there's never any doubting of Gable because his all-man persona is what that film is all about.

I'm sure many will disagree with me, but hey, here I am, just thinking through my keyboard....

Continue reading...

Olympics and Whatnot

There is actually a reason for my lack of posting recently. My schedule typically runs like this: sleep for ten hours, watch 3-4 hours of Olympics (recorded, or live), go to work for about 8 hours, go out for two hours, and repeat. Needless to say, not many movies have gotten watched (though I did see the mediocre Pineapple Express), which sort of makes my Netflix a bad investment. But the Summer Olympics only come around once every 4 years, so whatever.

It's tough to watch sports that are not Swimming or Gymnastics, because those are the focus of much of the American media circle. With that said, I will begin there.

Gymnastics are immensely entertaining, and I'm so glad USA won the gold and silver in women's all-around events. Nastia Liukin and Shawn Johnson performed amazing, and it proves that Alicia Sacramone was a weak link (with two crucial falls in her performances). Nastia deserved the gold for her fantastic routines (namely on uneven bars and beam, in my opinion). Shawn was great, but Nastia is a lot prettier, so she wins by default.

And how can we ignore the phenomenon that is Michael Phelps? He is a beast. Tonight he got his eighth gold medal this year, which means he went eight for eight. With his closest victory being by only .01 of a second, it was quite a thrill to watch him compete. Seeing his final race tonight is bound to be a piece of history long remembered, and I don't see anyone coming close to his accomplishments for a long, long time.

More entertaining than Gymnastics and Swimming are events such as Football (Soccer), Handball, Diving, a select few tennis matches, and Field events. Fortunately I have some random Soccer HD channel which shows almost all of the Olympic soccer games during the day.

Handball is a great sport which seems not so popular in America (we don't have either a team in either men's or women's). It is a fun sport to watch, especially because of players like Anita Gorbicz, who -- while not only a pleasure to look at -- make some of the most ridiculous plays ever. In a match between Hungary and Brazil early on, the score was 28-27 for Brazil with one second left in the game. Time was called on a foul, and it was expected that the ball would be quickly passed and then shot at the last second in an effort to tie; however, the ref placed the ball in the player's hand (not Gorbicz, some other chick), and she rocketed the ball overhand, much like a baseball pitch, straight into the goal before anyone knew what hit them. It's plays like that which make the Olympics so entertaining.

Another fantastic match was woman's Tennis singles, Serena Williams against Elena Dementieva. Williams was the number four seed and dominated early on, taking the first set 6 games to 4. During the second set Williams was up 4 games to 1 (I believe, or 3 to 0), but Elena managed to win 9 games in a row. This gave her the second set and must have messed Williams up mentally. Up 4 games to 0 in the last set (yeah, it must have been 4-1 in set 2), Williams managed to win a couple games, but Elena closed out the match, forcing an upset and creating a fantastic comeback. Great match.

And it stinks that a lot of these lesser sports aren't more widely broadcast. But I watch what I can, and maybe I'll report back in a few days.

Continue reading...

Project Runway: Welcome to the Jungle

Another week of Project Runway! Woo!

What the hell is Brooke Shields doing on this show? Well, all right, I know why she is, but she would be far from my first choice of celebrity judge.

I like the concept where Brooke picks the best sketches of the bunch as team leaders. It worked well with Sarah Jessica Parker last season, and looks to be even better this season (because it's not a $15 budget).

Suede needs to stop being a little bitch. Stop crying about how little fabric you have. You're feeling uncomfortable? Big deal, just make it work. Wow, I sound like Tim Gunn...

Speaking on Tim Gunn, I love his comments on Korto's outfit. "It looks like a big sweet potato." Oh, it does. What an awful orange color.

"Some of you are still sewing, question mark." Tim Gunn, again, great. I make it sound like there aren't even contestants.

The GOOD: Jerell/Stella, Terri/Suede

The MEH: Kelli/Daniel, Blayne/LeAnne

The BAD: Korto/Joe, Keith/Kenley

Thank you Blayne for saying it's an integrity issue, and that you should go home because you were the leader. Maturity is scarce in reality TV.

The winner was Keith/Kenley, seen below. Disagreement from me.



Kelli goes home for her design with Daniel (seen below). I knew they wouldn't boot Blayne -- he's too entertaining to go home this soon.



Oh my God, I HATE Chris. Why is he back next episode? Vomit.

Continue reading...

A Little Ledger Talk

Today 'A Knight's Tale' was on TBS. I hadn't seen the movie in a few months, but it's always a pleasure. Sure, it's not a great film. But it's structured well and is very entertaining. Yet, the real reason 'A Knight's Tale' works so well is because of how great an actor Heath Ledger was. Not only could he perform, but he had a kind of charisma that is matched by few actors around today.

The first role I saw him in was '10 Things I Hate About You.' I majored in English, so we all know I love me some Shakespeare. The movie itself was better than most teen comedies of the late-90s era, but even here one could tell that Heath Ledger was a standout. No one else's career in that film blossomed near as much as Ledgers.

He had a small, but important role in 'The Patriot' -- a film I used to enjoy before I knew much about film. 'The Patriot' is mediocre in every sense of the word, but as always, Ledger was great.

'Monster's Ball' is a fantastic film. I do not think Halle Berry should have won the Best Actress Oscar, but I do think Ledger should have been nominated for Supporting. Sure, his role was small, but very touching, and also very crucial to this film.

Let's not talk about 'The Four Feathers' or 'The Order' (though the latter had some good scenes -- the overall film was pretty bad). It's interesting, though, how 'The Order' had the same writer/director as 'A Knight's Tale,' as well as Shannyn Sossamon and Mark Addy, yet turned out so bad.

I never saw 'Lords of Dogtown' and really have no desire to. Am I missing anything?

'The Brothers Grimm' came in with the wave of 'Van Helsing,' 'Underworld,' and the rising of comic book adaptations. Not awful, but not the best film out there.

'Brokeback Mountain' would be the high point of Ledger's career, spare for his final performance. Brokeback is such an extraordinary film.... It really irritates me when people are ignorant enough to call it a 'gay cowboy movie.' Grow up. It's a mature film with some draining performances. Philip Seymour Hoffman deserved his 'Capote' Oscar, but Ledger's Ennis Del Mar will be long remembered.

Ledger did a few more film until we come to the most recent success, 'The Dark Knight.' Heath Ledger as the Joker is easily the best part of TDK. Yes, easily. And TDK is a great film. But there is such an amazing performance here that if he does not win a posthumous Oscar I will be shocked. And he should not win it for sympathy or nostalgia, but because his Joker is the best performance of the year.

What is my point?

Heath Ledger was a great actor. His death is a tragedy. Why must one of the best actors of this generation meet their death so early, whereas countless untalented men continue to make awful films? Who knows.

Continue reading...

Project Runway: Rings of Glory

Another week, another episode of Project Runway. Oh, and we also have some topless Heidi Klum pictures roaming the internet, so that's awesome as well.

This is a freaking awesome. Designing outfits for the opening ceremony for the summer Olympics? If there's one 'sport' I like to watch, it's the Olympics. See what I did there? The Olympics include multiple sports, so I get to like plenty of sports.

Oh my God, Stella. We know you love leather. Shut up. We get it.

Blayne's tanning addiction is pretty funny. I like how he thinks he'll shrivel up and get weak and die if he gets pale. So, tanning jokes = funny. Ghetto slang = awful.

However, Blayne's whole thing about not liking The Beatles is... blah.

I love the drama. Fighting over the threading of the machine? Great. Making fun of Kenley's constant laughing? Fantastic (even though I like her).

I like Jerell's outfit, but I don't think it's 'America' enough. As in, the traditional red, white, and blue. But maybe the judges will like it.

So here's the runway!

The GOOD: LeAnne (I like her a lot) ,
Jerell (his hot model helps, but it's not for athletes) ,
Terri

The BAD: Korto (well made, but not feeling it) ,
Suede, Daniel ,
Stella ,
Jennifer

I had Joe under the good, but on a closer look I don't like it. The 'skort' does not look well done at all. The top is great, though.

Michael Kors is the best. Talking about Daniel, "I don't know where she's from... the Republic of Cocktail Land?" "If her sport is drinking, it's a good dress."

I don't think Korto should have won at all. But Jennifer going home was definitely the right decision.

Edit: I was reading Tim Gunn's blog about the episode, and here's what he said about Terri's:

Terri designed the most classic American look of the group. It was successful, it was stunning, it was appropriate, and it was ambitious. She created a menswear tailored jacket with a wide lapel over a horizontal striped strapless top, accessorized with an ascot-like scarf. Below, she had a beautifully fitting white pant with a tuxedo stripe on the right leg, only. I swooned. So as happy as I am for Korto, why didn't Terry win?

Why didn't Terri win, indeed. I agree completely.

Continue reading...

A Thing About The Dark Knight (and superhero movies in general)

The Dark Knight is an excellent film. Everything about it is so well-crafted that it really does set a new benchmark for 'superhero' films. I don't think anyone with film sense can deny that one.

However, I saw the film for a second time a couple days ago. What I've noticed (even before TDK) is that -- for me -- superhero movies have very little re-watch value (superheroes of all shapes and sizes, and directors). The film is very good, but on a second viewing it has some lulls that, while important to the film, just seem to drag and drag until we get to the next scene with Heath Ledger (who was easily the best part of the film -- and not just from nostalgia). For instance, Batman's visit to Asia to capture the crime lord because Batman has no jurisdiction. Cool, and effective, but not near as exciting as the rest of the film.

In my original review I gave the film a 9.5/10. This was for two reasons: The first is that I try to reserve 10s for films that are undeniably perfect (classics, mostly). We'll say that The Godfather is a 10. A recent example of a 10 would be No Country for Old Men. The Departed while close, is a 9.5. But the second reason was that something just felt 'off.' I've thought this over for a long time, and the best I can come up with is, 'There is too much trying to be done in too short of a time.'

Chris Nolan (the director and co-writer) explained the two 'bad guy' situation the best. He explained how we have one antagonist, The Joker, who has no reason and no empathy for human life, and symbolizes complete chaos. And then we have Two-face/Harvey Dent, who symbolizes the rise and fall of one of Gotham's own heroes. And Batman must deal with all of those, as well as his personal issues. It's a great setup, and it works. But I feel the ~2.5 hour runtime is not sufficient to fulfill all of that. Harvey Dent needs more time. But more than that, Batman needs more time.

We know The Joker. We know how he plays, we know how he kills. We know Harvey Dent's story. What we're missing in this film is any feeling for Bruce Wayne himself. What Batman Begins did was give us a new, improved, human Batman that was not so much like the ridiculous cartoon that recent films have made him. He was a mortal with a past and an uncertain future. Here, in The Dark Knight, it feels like Bruce Wayne's story is pushed to the background to focus on Harvey Dent and The Joker. That is the primary flaw of the film.

And that is why I think the film should have either been longer, with more Bruce Wayne internal struggle, or shorter, without Two-face (though it would have been a completely different film, no doubt). But still, this is a great film, and one that will certainly be studied, if anything, for it's enormous box office success.

In conclusion, here is what I have to say: I asked my friend David which he liked better -- WALL-E or The Dark Knight. He said The Dark Knight. I commented on the re-watch value, and said I liked WALL-E more. But I needed to see each again to get a real opinion. Now that I've seen both of them twice, I can safely say I like WALL-E a lot more. Is it a better movie? Maybe, maybe not.

And for the record, last year David thought There Will Be Blood was a better film that No Country for Old Men (and liked TWBB more). I liked NCfOM and thought it was a better film. Neither of us are right or wrong, but if that helps you form an opinion, so be it. I'm finished.

Continue reading...

Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist

This looks kind of cute and kind of funny. Like Superbad, except less vulgar and more intelligent (judging from the trailer).

Continue reading...