1.28.2007



Ok. I love the Silver Surfer. Seriously, one of my favorite comic book characters when I was growing up. And he looks pretty cool and all, but a cure for cancer and AIDS will be invented before I see this movie.

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1.27.2007

Here's a few statistics:

Since 1990, no film from the bottom two of the five nominated best pictures, in Box Office numbers, has won. The only 3rd place one was American Beauty.

There has only been (I think) 3 instances where a film has won without a Best Director nomination, the last one being in 1989 for Driving Miss Daisy.

There has NEVER been two consecutive years with a Director/Picture split, and since there was one last year...

So far, DOMESTIC BO:

The Departed: $121 million
Little Miss Sunshine: $59 million
The Queen: $36 million
Babel: $24 million
Letters from Iwo Jima: $2 million

Also, Departed has about $255 overseas.

So, theoretically it's a 'Departed' vs. 'The Queen' race. I like it.

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1.26.2007

I have this really bad habit where I push certain buttons on my keyboard or mouse excessively, even though they don't do anything (well, they do something, but I don't need them, but I keep clicking them anyway).

So last night, the scroll wheel on my mouse broke. I think I pushed it in so much that it busted its track, or whatever holds it in place, so now it won't scroll or click anything. This is so frustrating, since now I have to scroll with either the arrow keys or by dragging the bar on the side. Also, now I can't use that button to open a link in a new window.

This is the most tragic thing that's happened to me recently. I don't want to have to spend $40 on a new mouse. But, this is yet another example of how you don't realize how much you need something until its gone. I guess I'm stuck living like a caveman for a while.

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1.23.2007

Anyone who knows me personally knows I love the Oscars, even if it shits on me (and pretty much everyone) repeatedly. With that said, I think it's safe to assume that I watch the Oscars more closely than anyone who would be reading this (only one possible exception comes to mind), so I'll make a nice, long post for those who want to seem as 'in the know' as a person can be at this point.

First, let's remember that it is still very early in the season. Tides can change like that (snaps fingers). Also, keep in mind that the best film doesn't always win, but it's often the film that is best campaigned. But then again, that doesn't explain why 'Dreamgirls' didn't even get a director of best picture nomination. So what does all this mean? Basically - nothing is for sure, and while statistics may help in anaylzing things here and there, and sometimes a performance or movie may be the best, that doesn't always result in the little gold statue. Hell, just last year, 'Brokeback Mountain' was considered the huge frontrunner, won an amazing number of awards, including the best director Oscar, and everyone thought it was a sure thing until Jack said, "Crash."

I'm going to try not to make predictions right now (more detailed post in about a month), but it's hard not to mention the favorites. So, without further ado:

Best Picture: Babel, The Departed, Letters from Iwo Jima, Little Miss Sunshine, The Queen

The big surprise here is no 'Dreamgirls.' This proves that no one should ever underestimate the amount of love the AMPAS has for Clint Eastwood. Also, every movie in this catagory has a crutch. 'Babel' is too international, too bland (that's my opinion), under $20 million box office, and too much like 'Crash' (lots of small stories that tie together) to pull ahead. 'The Departed' is a remake from a Hong Kong movie, only has five nominations, and is also quite violent. 'Letters' is foreign, but apparently that didn't stop it from getting nominated, but also awarding another Eastwood movie two years later is very unlikely. 'Letters' also only has four nods. 'Sunshine' is too little (see what I did there?), has no director nod (this is a pretty huge deal), only four nods as well, and it's more of a indie comedy family cheesy movie than the traditional type of movie that takes Best Pic. Then, of course, 'The Queen' is a fantastic movie, but it isn't really anyone's "favorite," and also is showing some early signs of weakness (no Sup. Actor nod, as I'll explain later).

Unless there's a movie that is too huge and too good to ignore ('American Beauty' and 'Silence of the Lambs' come to mind as the only recent examples), nothing can be for sure. I really want 'The Departed' to win, and I think it can, so I'd put that as my very early prediction. And for the record, I thought 'Dreamgirls' was better than both 'Little Miss Sunshine' and 'Babel.'

Achievement in Directing: Alejandro González Iñárritu - "Babel", Martin Scorsese - "The Departed", Clint Eastwood - "Letters from Iwo Jima", Stephen Frears - "The Queen", Paul Greengrass - "United 93"

Another shocking miss for Bill Condon, the director of 'Dreamgirls.' Scorsese is the clear favorite here, but I'm sure everyone is aware of how he's been denied numerous times in the past. Eastwood winning would be very unlikely, since he won two years ago, plus that would be his third directing Oscar. González Iñárritu winning would be a joke. Greengrass and Frears both did a good job, but nothing awards worthy. Seriously, if Scorsese loses, what the fuck?

Lead Actor: Leonardo DiCaprio - "Blood Diamond", Ryan Gosling - "Half Nelson", Peter O’Toole - "Venus", Will Smith - "The Pursuit of Happyness", Forest Whitaker - "The Last King of Scotland"

A bit of a shocker that Leo was nominated for 'Blood Diamond' and not 'The Departed,' though I hear his performance was stronger in the former (but I'm skeptical, since his performance in 'The Departed' was my favorite of the year). But, unfortunately, that means there might not be as much 'Departed' love as one could hope (though there was a ton of catagory confusion, which probably screwed 'The Departed' over, but that's another post for another day). I really want to see 'Half Nelson,' and there's no way Gosling will win, but I'm glad he was nominated. Will Smith should just be happy he was nominated as well, since there were a few performances more noteworthy than his. Peter O'Toole nomination is no shock, and people are really saying that, after losing seven times prior and getting an honorary Oscar, the Academy will feel sorry for him and give him the win. I think that's a bogus argument, but who knows - he may be a real threat. Forest Whitaker has been winning everything everywhere, so he is the clear favorite going in, but he has the huge handicap of his movie not being nominated in any other catagories. Seriously, that's pretty big, but I would still almost say he's unstoppable.

Lead Actress: Penélope Cruz - "Volver", Judi Dench - "Notes on a Scandal", Helen Mirren - "The Queen", Meryl Streep - "The Devil Wears Prada", Kate Winslet - "Little Children"

These five nominees have been set for months, and Helen Mirren will win without question. The other four nominees might as well not show up (and you guys know how much I love Meryl).

Supporting Actor: Alan Arkin - "Little Miss Sunshine", Jackie Earle Haley - "Little Children", Djimon Hounsou - "Blood Diamond", Eddie Murphy - "Dreamgirls", Mark Wahlberg - "The Departed"

I'm so happy Mark Wahlberg was nominated. If 'Departed' didn't snag a nom here (either Wahlberg or Jack Nicholson) it would've been bad. Arkin being nominated instead of Michael Sheen for 'The Queen' is clearly some kind of joke, and is a pretty bad sign for the royal flick. The rest are not surprises, and Murphy is the clear favorite. I just have a hard time imaging a trailer say 'Doctor Doolittle 7, featuring Academy Award Winner Eddie Murphy.' I can see Haley pulling the upset.

Supporting Actress: Adriana Barraza - "Babel", Cate Blanchett - "Notes on a Scandal", Abigail Breslin - "Little Miss Sunshine", Jennifer Hudson - "Dreamgirls", Rinko Kikuchi - "Babel"

Jen Hudson is the natural favorite, which kind of stinks. I still say that this should be an award for acting, and if you want your singing awarded, go to the Grammys. A Rinko Kikuchi win would make me happy, and isn't totally impossible. Two 'Babel' girl nominations is (unfortunately) a good sign for that movie, but could lead to split voting. The nomination of Little Miss Sunshine herself is a great sign for the indie flick, and if she didn't get nominated, there would be no way 'Sunshine' would win best picture.

Adapted Screenplay: 'Borat,' 'Children of Men,' 'The Departed,' 'Little Children,' 'Notes on a Scandal'

If 'The Departed' loses this, I will cry. Potential, but very unlikely upset: 'Borat'

Original Screenplay: 'Babel,' 'Letters from Iwo Jima,' 'Little Miss Sunshine,' 'Pan's Labyrinth,' 'The Queen'

This one is a lot harder to call than Adapted Screenplay. I'm so happy 'Labyrinth' is getting recognition outside of the Foreign Film catagory, but I don't think it's winning this (though that'd be pretty sweet). 'Babel' winning would also be a terrible choice. 'Letters,' very unlikely. That makes this a two horse race. More will be clear once the WGA (Writer's Guild) announces the winner, but 'The Queen' won the globes, and I personally think that its screenplay is much more refined, witty, artistic, and award-worthy than 'Sunshine.'

Ok, other catagories will get a very brief mention, and I'm only going to mention catagories I actually know something about.

Animated Feature: 'Cars' is gaining momentum, 'Happy Feet' losing steam. Good!

Cinematography: 'Children of Men' vs. 'Pan's Labyrinth.' To be honest, I loved both of these movies, so I would be happy as long as one of these two won. Prediction: 'Children of Men'

Foreign Film: With a lack of Almodovar's 'Volver,' the clear winner should be 'Pan's Labyrinth.'

Original Score: Desplat nominated for 'The Queen' instead of 'The Painted Veil' is odd. Maybe this is a good sign for 'The Queen?' Either way, I've been listening to the 'Pan's Labyrinth' soundtrack for about a week now, so I'm a little biased in wanting that to win. Possible 'Babel' upset (ugh).

Original Song: Three out of the five nominees from 'Dreamgirls,' and obviously it will win for one of those. The trick is picking which one. Personally I would vote for 'Listen,' but that's just me. Even with split voting, I'm sure the winner will be one of those three.

So what the hell does all this mean? Who knows. All I can say is if you're a betting man (or girl), placing bets now on anything besides Lead Actress would be retarded. I'll try to refrain from the Oscar season monopolizing this blog, so I'll just make a post in a few weeks once it's closer to awards time. Then I'll state the 'frontrunner,' as well as who I want to win (which is the same maybe half the time). Until then, go tell this information to your friends so you can sound smart and informed.

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Since I haven't updated in a while, I guess I should write something. Oscar noms are announced in 7.5 hours, so I'll do a detailed post then, but for now, allow me to explain how Eli Roth is quite possibly the worst director ever.

I could've sworn I made a post about 'Hostel,' but apparently not. Well, to sum up, 'Hostel' could've been great, but ultimately the movie was a terrible failure in writing, directing, acting, and every other catagory thinkable for a movie credit.

A long time ago I saw a few minutes from the very end of 'Cabin Fever,' which was made by the same guy who did 'Hostel' - Eli Roth. I think I vaguely mentioned that I bought 'Cabin Fever' at Wal Mart for $4 because that was how much I would pay to rent it anyway.

Tonight I watched it, and let me say that not even Sean from 'Boy Meets World' could save this flick. I mean, I love me some good titty scenes (which is a staple in any good horror movie [other than 'Army of Darkness,' obviously, because that movie is above the genre]), and they weren't bad in 'Cabin Fever,' whereas in 'Hostel' the whole first 45 minutes - and I'm not gay, I swear - was topless women, and it got really old, really fast.

So anyway, 'Cabin Fever' was a lot better than 'Hostel,' but still quite terrible, falling into a lot of cliches that are typical of shitty movies. My brain is hurting even thinking about this movie.

So in conclusion, Eli Roth is zero for two, and all his future projects should be handed over to me for the good of mankind.

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1.20.2007

Today was the wide release of the extremely anticipated Pan's Labyrinth, a shocking mix of war, fantasy, and horror from writer/director Guillermo del Toro. I had very high expectations going in to this movie. I left with not all of them met, but still extremely satisfied.

Oh, where to begin? Let's start with the star of the picture, the person who takes every scene and makes it thirty times more vivid than the most advanced technical tools could produce - Ivana Baquero (who plays the little girl Ofelia). This twelve year-old girl delivers a performance so much more moving than most actresses in their prime can hope to achieve. The emotion she conveys in her small, simple gestures, such as telling a bedtime story to her unborn mother's child, make this story come to life. She is the point of bonding, the point where adults can find their inner child, and children can find their relation to the events on screen. I don't like to use the term 'brilliance,' but del Toro evokes an amazing aura from young Ivana that makes this movie so, so much more than just a visual effects extravaganza.

Saying this as sort of a disclaimer and a 'warning': there is a bit less 'fantasy' and 'labyrinth' than one is made to believe by the trailers. I'd say about 75% of the story takes place in Spain, revolving around the very real, very brutal Sergi López (who plays Capitan Vidal) and Maribel Verdú (Mercedes, the conflicted servant/maid), and the remaining 25% is about the fantasmal world where Ofelia (Ivana) is also an unproven Princess Moanna. But while this is misleading, the more I think about it - as cheesy as this will sound - the more I love this movie.

Sergi López does an amazing job in portraying the brutal captain (capitan? Whatever). From the first impression you get of him, smashing in a man's face and nose with a wine bottle, it is nonstop tyrannical brutality. He is the most vicious incarnate of evil that I've seen in a movie since Amon Goeth in 'Schindler's List' (yes, I did just make that comparison). There is an abundance of hatred towards the captain, yet there is not a second where you doubt that he is a very real and terrifying man.

The visuals? The 'labyrinth'? The plot, the storyline? All are top notch, and clearly del Toro has spent a considerable amount of time on this materpiece. The scenes are so elaborate, and the stretch of detail in every frame is astounding. The story makes me imagine that maybe if I, myself, drew a chalk doorway on my wall, that I could open a door to another world, and face the things that Ofelia does. This movie makes you want to believe. Even the gross, creepy scenes are beautiful.

I don't want to spoil the expreience by giving too much away. I don't know if I would say this is the 'best' movie of the year (hi, 'The Departed'), but it is easily a top three, easily the best foreign language movie, and everyone, except no one, should see this movie. If it is playing in your city, even if it's a thirty minute drive, I beg - no, command - you to see it. It will be the best $7.50 you will ever spend.

Rating: 10/10

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1.17.2007

So after finally seeing Mulholland Dr., the only thing that really needs to be said is this: Naomi Watts topless making out with another good-looking topless chick twice in the same movie is amazing.

Actually, the movie wasn't bad either. But for the reason listed above, a definite 10/10.

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1.15.2007

Today I was at an Old Navy store, and while my friend was buying something, I noticed that the debit machines had this sticker on them:

"Use your Old Navy card now and be closer to getting your next $10 bucks back."

So, when read aloud, the last part says, "your next ten dollars bucks back."

Brilliant!

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1.12.2007

Because I am A) awesome, and B) like to brag, I'm going to say "I totally called that shit" back in October.

But seriously, is it sad that I'm more excited for 'Pan's Labyrinth' than for my 21st birthday? 99% regular, 100% CotC (with an 8.7 average rating) on RT, a 97 on Metacritic, and actually winning some awards, even a few best pictures from various critic circles. I can't wait for next Friday.

Too bad it opened so close towards the end of the year that it's unlikely to get many Oscar nods, but who knows...

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1.11.2007

Three things in order of descending importance (or, 'interestingness,' if you prefer):

On Tuesday night I went to go see 'Dreamgirls' because it looked okay and has some good buzz. It was a Tuesday night and most people I knew were either busy, or just didn't want to see it, so I went by myself (and as lame as I am, this is not uncommon).

The line was long, which I found odd, since it was 10:00PM on a Tuesday night, but that's what happens in a college town. So I walk into my theatre expecting a decent crowd, but it's empty except for three girls in the front row. For some reason, that is very girly I'm sure, they were trying to take a picture of themselves (maybe going to see a movie is a once-a-year thing for them, but in that case, why waste it on 'Dreamgirls?'). I walked in, and they asked me to take a picture of them, so I did.

"Are you here by yourself?" one of them asked.

"Yeah," I said, then gave the reasons stated above.

"You can sit with us if you want," she said. To be honest I didn't feel like talking to anyone and just wanted to watch the fucking movie, but oh well, I sat next to that girl. Funny thing is she introduced herself to me first, and mentioned her name twice, and about 30 seconds later I completely forgot it, whereas I remember the other two's names now (2 days later). Kind of weird.

So we made small talk through the previews, and then when the movie started they all shut up, but they were always sending text messages (I assume) throughout the movie, which I don't understand. How can you enjoy a movie when you're doing that?

When the movie ended we went our separate ways and said it was nice to meet each other, so this story is actually pretty anticlimactic, so I'll stop here.

Secondly, I went to Burger King tonight for dinner, and I love The King. I hate when I get fries, and an onion ring slips into the container with my fries. I hate onions, and just the smell grosses me out. Assholes.

And lastly, 'Dreamgirls' was pretty good, but I'm easily forgetting it now. The problem, like with most musicals (an exception to this rule off the top of my head is 'Chicago'), is that I can just save myself an hour and listen to the few good songs from the soundtrack while doing something else, and have the same feeling. Also, Jennifer Hudson can sing, yes, but if she wins the Best Supporting Acresss Oscar I'll be pretty pissed off. This isn't the Grammys, and acting is supposed to be awarded, and her acting was pretty shitty. Award acting, not voices, please. The movie's worth at least a rental, though, or maybe a dollar theatre viewing.

Rating: 7/10

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1.08.2007

New semester starts tomorrow, and while I should be sleeping, fuck it, time to update.

Today I went and saw Children of Men, which was not disappointing. Clive Owen plays the lead, with support from Michael Caine and Julianne Moore. The year is 2027, and the inciting incident is when the world's youngest person dies at the age of eighteen. Women have been infertile, until a 'fuji' (fujitive) named Kee somehow miraculously becomes pregnant.

[It's going to be hard to avoid spoilers, but I think this is clean.]

The story is fast-paced as Clive Owen tries to keep secrecy and stealth, attempting to make it to the 'Human Project' (what this is is left ambiguous) safely. The story as a thriller is intense, but what really makes this movie so grand is the brief moments we are pulled from all the violence and can feel the appreciation of the miracle that the story presents.

That leads this review to pointing out the movie's greatest achievement, which is in its visuals, art direction, and cinematography. The setting is painted perfectly, and from the first minute of the film there's no shred of remains from any of the audience's present day - everything is in chaos, overrun, miserable, gloomy, and no one has any hope as they await the inevitable extinction of the human race.

The story chooses to sidestep the actual 'cause' of infertility, and ends without a tidy conclusion, but Alfonso Cuarón (director/writer, 'Y tu mamá también') trusts his viewers to understand the overall purpose.

'Children of Men' serves as a great break from all the crap that's come out recently, and at just over 100 minutes, is definitely worth the time.

Rating: 9/10

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1.02.2007

With the new addition of the Wii to my household, as well as countless hours of playing Final Fantasy 12, I haven't had very much time to do much of anything lately. I have been getting a lot better at foosball, but that's beside the point.

I've seen a lot of movies since my last slew of glimpse reviews, but I don't feel like looking them up.

Tonight I caught a bit of the third Lord of the Rings movie, and I noticed this before, but didn't mention it: so Frodo gets the mythril shirt, which supposedly stops anything from piercing it (swords, etc). But then he gets stung by that enormous spider's stinger right in his stomach towards the end. Plothole? I think so. Oh well, still a good flick.

Oh, but for anyone who cares, I finally fixed my desktop computer, so I can leave the laptop for traveling purposes from now on. Also, with the new year, a few changes are already coming. I'm excited, but as always, slightly nervous and overly nostalgic. But I don't think much of that will show up here (except this post, obviously).

Because I feel like making this post longer, here are some 2006 awards arbitrarily handed out off the top of my head:

Biggest Joke - 'Crash' winning Best Picture
Best Beverage - Red Bull (Starbuck's double shots - runner-up)
Hottest Female - Carmen Electra (she was on some Taco Bell commercial earlier)
Hottest Male - Leonardo DiCaprio ('The Departed,' come on)
Best Sporting Event - World Cup, obviously
Best TV Show - Scrubs
Slang of the Year - Tie: "Uggo" and "Re-re"
Playa of the Year - Me, for keeping this thing updated (I said I would, but didn't actually think I would)
Best Investment - Netflix
Best Post - This one. Clueless reference? Idiotic college girl? Me at the library? The only thing missing is a picture, but unfortunately I didn't have my espionage camera glasses on at the time.
Biggest Waste of Time - Sitting through 'The Fountain'
Most Thankful For - Not paying to see 'The Fountain'
Idiot of the Year - Paris Hilton x 9203802947693576
Movie of the Year - 'Wallace and Gromit: The Curse of the Were-rabbit' (ok, maybe not, but I just love that dog)

Alright, that's it for now. Happy New Year kids!

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