A little treasure from Canada... Away From Her, which may sound unknown to most, is a film written and directed by Sarah Polley, whom most may know as 'the hot main blonde chick from Dawn of the Dead.' And even more annoying is I've been wanting to see it for a while, but it didn't come to Orlando or Ft. Walton Beach. So I forgot about it, then when seeing Ocean's Thirteen again at a terrible dollar theater, I see Away From Her is playing there. So tonight I was back at the ghetto theater.

This is not an easy movie to watch, the subject matter being the effects of Alzheimer's. An old couple of about sixty, Fiona and Grant Anderson, are in their little cabin in Canada. We get glimpses of the difficulty they have when Fiona washes a skillet, then absently opens the freezer, places it in there, and goes to the next room. Grant watches her in despair, then replaces the skillet under the sink, where all the pots go.

As the plot moves, the dilemma arises of putting Fiona in a nursing home, or trying to care for her himself. Relationships form between a sympathetic staff member and Grant, as with Fiona and other patients. But as time goes on, Fiona forgets who her husband is and becomes more attached to her new friends. But then her memory comes and goes. That's one of the most depressing parts, that one day Fiona is fine and knows what's going on, and the next, 'up in the clouds.'

This would sound like a teen drama, maybe Mean Girls, if it wasn't dealing with specific subject matter in such a delicate way that even a scene where Grant talks to a goth-rocker-teenage girl we get some understanding.

Okay, lost my train of thought. I really want to rant about another movie, so...

6.5/7

Tonight I caught a midnight showing of Rob Zombie's remake of Halloween. My God, what a travesty.

Making this movie experience even worse, I watched the original just before going to the theater. The original is great -- a classic. John Carpenter created a template for countless future horror flicks (some good, a lot not).

To begin with, Rob Zombie's remake spends an excessive amount of time on the childhood years. First he gives us an assortment of cliches and white trash language that is funny, I guess, if you laugh at a drunk man calling his wife a 'bitch' and telling her to 'do the God damn dishes.' We then see Michael Meyers, 10, get picked on a little at school. That's not overdone either... So after school he beats the kid to a pulp, then that night kills his step-dad, sister, sister's boyfriend, and for some reason leaves his baby sister alone. Mom finds the horror.

So essentially after wasting the first twenty minutes, we arrive at the same exact conclusion we got in the John Carpenter version after the first scene. I thought less was more? Apparently not for Rob Zombie.

So we, the audience, suffers so long through watching Michael in prison that I was about to fall asleep, then there's one of the most ridiculous jail escapes I've ever seen. Later his ability to break chains is slyly explained with him being able to lift half a ton by himself. Okay.

After an hour of these shenanigans, the plot follows the original for a while, with some of the same casualties in some of the same places. Obviously there's more boobs and blood and gore, because subtlety and finesse are nonexistent here. Rob Zombie only cares about trying to cram as much R rated material into each scene as possible. Ever notice how in the original characters who have sex die, and the one(s) who don't live? It's even made fun of in 'Scream.' Well, it's true, and that point was a nice find in the original if you paid attention. Here it's thrown at us so hard I don't want to even see a girl in a bathing suit unless I have a loaded revolver. With at least four shots, since Michael can take numerous bullets.

I say this with trouble, but one thing that improved a bit was the ending action scenes. Not the ending. Not any other part of the movie. I just liked having a moderately long chase scene, since it's, you know, a horror movie. But again, not near enough reason to see it.

I only saw this movie because of my love for the original, and I can safely say that John Carpenter, regardless of how the rest of his career turned out, will always be a better writer/director than Rob Zombie.

Rating: 0.5/7

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A few sweet movie trailers.



Looks like they're pushing the Oscar angle hard, but why not? Denzel Washington, Russell Crowe, Ridley Scott, Steven Zaillian. Should be a good flick.



French subtitles are a bit annoying, but... Woody Allen might be back in good form now.



Not the most informative trailer, but Ang Lee could have another hit on his hands.

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So I just put in Roman Holiday for my nightly movie viewing. As I was watching the opening credits, I caught that it says, "and introducing Audrey Hepburn."

Now I know all the stories about this, that it was her first role, that she won an Oscar for this movie, that Gregory Peck called it, etc. etc. etc.

The point I'm trying to make is that now, almost 55 years later, I'm watching this movie, and while RH was her first real role, Audrey Hepburn has long since won her Oscar, played out her career, died, and become pretty much legendary. And this is where it started.

I think that's one reason why I like watching old movies so much, is because if you pay enough attention and put it together right, it's just like watching history.

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Two movie notes, one on a movie that came out this week, one I just bought on DVD.

Last night I went and saw Superbad, which was a great experience. Normally I don't laugh at dick jokes, but they're met with some witty allusions from other characters, so it's just great. That probably made no sense. An example would be something like, Seth makes a joke about how he dated the hottest chick ever two years ago, and now his sex life is over, all down-hill from here. Then Evan says, 'Like Orson Welles.' Get it? If you do, congratulations. Out of the sold out theater, I think one of my friends and I were the only two people to laugh/get it.

But those jokes are definitely backseat to the vulgar, inappropriate, yet ultimately true statements made by the protagonists. And for once the 'lesson' at the end of the movie isn't done in cliche. Sure, the motif is a bit old-fashioned, but it plays out well.

My only real gripe with the movie is length. The scenes with the police officers for the first thirty minutes they had on screen were funny, but when the same two cops kept showing up it grew tiresome. While the rest of the movie stayed fresh, the cops became redundant, their jokes predictable. I guess, though, since Seth Rogan (who plays one of the cops) was a co-writer, he had to give himself as much screen time as possible.

Rating: 6/7

Now, seven months ago, because I was lazy, I gave Mulholland Dr. a 10/10 because Naomi Watts has lesbian scenes topless. Now, that's definitely a good reason for a perfect score, but there's a lot more to the movie than hot lesbian action.

I try to use the word 'masterpiece' sparingly. Mulholland Dr., if not a masterpiece, is very, very close. It is definitely David Lynch's best film. The movie clocks in at 145 minutes, with scenes ranging from music auditions to murders. There's quite a few storylines, and you can honestly double the count of however many characters you have, because the last forty or so minutes will fuck you over once you think you have the movie put together.

That's why this movie is so great. There are plenty (I've read a dozen, all of which could be valid) of theories, and am pretty stuck on my own. But still, every time I watch the movie, I question myself. To explain plot points would take pages, and it still would make no sense. Let's just say that there's a thin line between dream and reality, and nothing is really certain when it's all said and done.

I would type up my interpretation with a spoiler alert, but I know people would read it anyway without seeing the movie, so I won't. I'll leave it up to you, and if you're lucky you'll enjoy drawing your own conclusions.

Rating: 7/7

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So at this other site I'm doing weekly 'what's opening' glimpses. I figure, if I'm doing it anyway, might as well post here. Why am I doing this? Because no one wants to spend $7-$11 AND be forced to sit through a bad movie. Lose/lose. Of course, I'll be a little biased because I have better taste and have seen more movies than most people, but I'll keep some objectivity in mind. Modesty, not so much. Also, with the summer blockbuster season ending and the 'Oscar season' coming up, this will be a little guide.


First, and probably the most popular release this weekend is Superbad. IMDb. Trailer.

The trailer looks funny, which usually means the movie is mediocre. However, a surprising 82 on Metacritic and 89% CotC on RottenTomatoes make me think this is 114 minutes of good entertainment.

Second up in wide release is The Invasion IMDb. Trailer.

As much as I like Nicole Kidman, this looks trivial at best. Even the better reviews say it's predictable and, well, bad. Skip.

The last wide release this weekend is The Last Legion. IMDb. Trailer.

So aside from the terrible cheesy trailer and that the little kid is from Love Actually, the movie looks entertaining. But alas, I haven't heard anything about it before I watched the trailer just now, which usually means one thing: disaster.

This isn't really my thing, but since Leo DiCaprio is a pretty big star, here's The 11th Hour. IMDb. Trailer.

I mention this because I've heard more about this than both The Invasion and Last Legion, even though it's only in limited release. It's a documentary about Earth's climate, what people can do to save it, etc. If that's your thing you should check it out. If not, well... don't.


There's a few other limited releases, but they either won't attract any attention BO-wise, or aren't worth mentioning yet.

Jon's Choice

Go see Superbad.

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Since the movie I wanted to see this weekend was only in limited release (Rocket Science), instead I went to see 'Stardust.'

Surprisingly, though the movie is overly congested by the end with sub-plots and deus ex machinas, it's so fun that it doesn't matter.

Not straying far from the mold for romances, fantasies, or a combination of both, there's still a traditional sense of 'quest' and 'love' that has been around since, well, forever. What Stardust attempts to do is blend the realities, with a boy from real-world England going into a fantasy world where ghosts provide hilarious commentary, stars are incarnated as beautiful ladies (Claire Danes, whom I love forever), and witches need to eat hearts to survive.

The movie hits just the right amount of comedy, and though it's not overwhelming, it seems that the movie itself is just a tad too long. It breaks the two hour marker, which is almost a cardinal sin of rom-coms. Even though Robert DeNiro had some great moments, cutting out his plot line could've shortened the movie and not hurt it at all. I think it would've clocked in at about 90 minutes, which is close to perfect.

And why is Michelle Pfeiffer, even at (almost) 50, still the hottest chick in this movie? She's such a great actress and I'm glad she's back after a few years break. Between this and Hairspray I like her infinitely more.

If you're on the fence about seeing this, remember what one guy said to his group of 5 guy friends when the credits came up: "See, I told you it wasn't going to be as gay as you thought!"

Rating: 5.5/7

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I was at work tonight doing whatever, and these kids came up to me. Conversation went something like this:

Girls: What's your name?

Jon: Why, do I look like someone you know?

Girls: Yeah. What's your name?

Jon: What's your friend's name, and I'll tell you if it's the same as mine.

[at this point I think maybe they have me confused with my brother]

Girls: Warren, or _______, or ___________ (they said a few W names).

Jon: Nope. Does your friend live here?

Girls: No. We're from Tennessee.

Jon: Then why would I be, or know, him? I'm working here, so obviously I live here.

Girls: I don't know..........

Man, some people . . . .

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So basically the movie 'Becoming Jane' is the exact same premise as 'Shakespeare in Love,' except instead of it being about an author that mattered, it's about Jane Austen. Sweet! Trailer below.

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