Which Gaffe(s) Is(Are) Worse?

Which of these gaffes by Mr. President is worse. First is the most recent from Obama, where he makes fun of his own bowling score, saying his 129 was "like the Special Olympics, or something."



Honestly I don't find that very offensive. People are just way too touchy about way too many subject.

Next, here are 5 epic Bush gaffes (there are way too many to find a video on just one, and way too many to take up only one video. But here is just one).



Wow, Bush has to have been the worst public speaker ever. Honestly.

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Make Me A Supermodel

So, new season of Make Me A Supermodel.

I love Jordan. Call me?

http://www.bravotv.com/make-me-a-supermodel/jordan -> Her pictures are all so awful, which makes her so much cuter. And by 'awful' I mean 'normal and homey.' Also, from her bio: "Her favorite activities include drawing, video games, and attending baseball games." Best reality contestant ever?

Call me. For serious.

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Two Overdue Movies

I finally got around to watching two movies I've been putting off: Reno 911: Miami, and National Treasure (the first one [I know]).

I'm a big fan of the Reno 911! show. I was all over that goodness in the first season, and some of my friends said it was crap (then later they 'told me about it,' and deny the prior history), but came to realize its greatness. The movie, while amusing, lacked the punch of the TV show. I think it was because the film had to be dragged out to actual film length. The runtime from start to credits is about 73 minutes, plus some bloopers and whatnot. If they trimmed it down to 40 minutes it would have been perfect, but what can you do? One good thing did come from this film, though: boobies. It never hurts to have a former Playboy centerfold walking around topless for a 5 minute scene. More filmmakers should take that tip.

National Treasure... where to get started. Completely ridiculous and preposterous from start to finish. A few scenes are entertaining, but the overall implausibility just shatters any chance this movie had at decency. Plus the heroes use Google (and the villains use Yahoo!) for guidance on their frolicking. Terrible.

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Hiatus

Apologies on the blogging front. I've been trying to perfect this short story, this piece of 'real writing.' Regular posting will resume shortly.

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Top Twelve Reasons Watchmen Fails at Adaptation

I previously made a post ranting about how disappointed I was in the Watchmen film. Here I am going to justify that opinion. A few things to keep in mind: These are based off of the theatrical release, not any 'director's cut' that may follow. Also, there will be very heavy spoilers and I suggest not reading if you haven't at least seen the movie, but ideally you will have read the graphic novel and seen the film.

Top 12, as in 12 chapters of the graphic novel, after the cut.

12. Removal of Nite Owl's Hoverscooters

After Archie crashes in Antarctica, originally in the comic Nite Owl gets out two Hoverscooters to make it the rest of the distance to Veidt's fort. This was funny, especially because the scooters were also owl-themed. In the film, however, they land close and just walk. Very lame.

11. Veidt Poisoning His Assistants with their Toast

In the original graphic novel, Veidt gets rids of his assistants by, while they are in effectively a greenhouse, he opens it and mountains of snow pour in, killing them. This is a hundred times cooler than the cliche of putting poison in the champagne and Veidt himself simply not drinking it.

10. Removal of Dr. Manhattan Saying He Knows He Kills Someone, But Doesn't Know Who

The clouding of Dr. Manhattan's vision is in both versions, but in the graphic novel Manhattan tells Laurie that he knows he kills someone, but not who. This is fantastic because we assume he will kill Veidt, the "bad guy," and it is completely shocking when he actually kills Rorschach, who, oddly, Manhattan sees as the "bad guy" then. This curve ball being removed, again for no reason, is disappointing.

9. No Explanation of Rorschach's Mask

The mask Rorschach wears is a custom one from the remnants of a dress a girl left at a place he worked. She thought it was ugly, but he thought it was beautiful the way the black and white never merged into gray (which, obviously, mirrors his theory on right and wrong--no gray area). This also deeply affects Rorschach because the girl who left the dress is murdered in front of a whole group of people and none of them do anything. Add in the fact that Rorschach's history is merely glanced over, and I sense lots of failure.

8. In the Beginning, It Is Obviously Veidt

The scene with the Comedian being killed in the beginning was drawn out, but I could deal with that. What I could not deal with is the fact that part of the killer's face is revealed, and also his build is clearly Veidt's. Add that to the fact that the marketing for the film clearly points out how Veidt is willing to make sacrifices, and we have any surprise ruined.

7. Nite Owl Attacking Veidt After Rorschach's Death

Really? This is so dumb I can't even explain it. Nite Owl accepted Veidt's plan as making sense, as did everyone except Rorschach. Originally, Nite Owl and Silk Spectre II go get it on after they find out Veidt's plan. Nite Owl seeing Rorschach killed and going back and beating up Veidt was just corny and Hollywood and bad.

6. Veidt Is a Wimp

Transitioning from my last point, in the graphic novel not only is Veidt super smart, but he is amazingly well-built. He is always working out, either on the TV specials or during interviews (one interviewer says he never had a girlfriend who didn't want to bang the guy). Yet in the film, while Veidt beats plenty of people up, it seems fairly obvious he is scrawny. Huge casting error.

5. Nite Owl Warning Veidt Instead of Rorschach

In the graphic novel Rorschach is the one who goes around and warns everyone about a 'mask killer.' I may be remembering this incorrectly, but Rorschach doesn't warn Veidt at all, does he? Nite Owl does. This makes no sense. Especially because later Veidt stages his own attack (which was horribly done in the film, with all the extra political people for no reason) to further Rorschach's theory and throw him off the real motive. Shame.

4. Laurie Has the Last Name 'Jupiter'

This small detail really bugs me. In the graphic novel Laurie specifically used the last name Juspeczyk because she strongly disliked her mom and being associated with her publicity as the risque original Silk Spectre. This furthered the mother/daughter arc, and it being removed says a lot (by not saying it).

3. Almost No New Frontiersman or Newsstand

Sure, there are newspapers all around, but the New Frontiersman doesn't show up until Rorschach drops off his journal at the end and we miss the whole dynamic of the media at the time. Also, the newsstand is such a huge part of the story because almost all of the characters go there at some point, and their small interactions are very interesting. Plus this is a transition to the Tales of the Black Freighter, which is going to be a cheap marketing ploy on straight-to-DVD. Fail.

2. Not Enough Hollis Mason

Hollis Mason, as I've said, is almost like a moral center to Watchmen. He was in the original Minutemen, was a guide for Dan, familiarized the world with the Minutemen through his book (which in itself is very interesting and perfect, I would buy just that as a standalone), paved the way for Veidt's success in marketing, and his mugging on Halloween, where the kids come to visit him and find his body, is one of the saddest points in the graphic novel. Yet in the film, he has two terribly brief scenes and then just disappears. It doesn't even show him dying when the city explodes. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

1. No Alien Explosion / Substitution of Framing Dr. Manhattan

Dear God, why? I don't know what to address first--how great the original idea of the alien was, or how stupid framing Dr. Manhattan was. Originally, Veidt's plan was to captures a large amount of scientists and artists (which the fact that they are missing is a mystery build through the whole book, and in itself is interesting, and also ties in with The Black Freighter), and on an island they designed a super huge alien. The Comedian found this alien, and that's why Veidt killed him, so he wouldn't talk (this is vaguely skimmed over in the film). Also, Veidt has the boat with all these artists and scientists explode, which is the along the lines of what he did with his assistants when he flooded them in the snow. Then he teleports the alien to the city, which explodes, and there is mass carnage and remnants of it everywhere. Very creepy. And under the idea that the aliens are attacking, the world unites.

In the film, there is just an explosion, where we don't see the carnage. We don't get missing artists or scientists, and now Dr. Manhattan is framed. Seriously, I think this was just a way to get Dr. Manhattan more visible. This change hurts the movie in so many ways. They might as well have had Rorschach live and Dr. Manhattan stop the explosion and everything in the original comic thrown away.

................

And there are more things. Many more. But these are the worst changes. There were some good things in the film, I will admit, but I will post about those later. I guarantee, though, that that list won't have 12 items on it. Maybe three.

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Watchmen

I will admit that my expectations for Watchmen were high (for reasons unknown, because Zack Snyder is a hack). However, I have never been so disappointed in an adaptation in my life.

Everything added into the film that was not in the source comics was either awkward, completely out of character, or just useless. Whereas there were literally hundreds of little details that were absent which made the film hokey. Some were small details that make a huge difference and could have easily been put in (for example, in the comic, Laurie reverts to the last name Juspeczyk to distance herself from her mother and her image. That is a minor detail that says A LOT. Yet in the movie they were lazy and had them both with the last name Jupiter.). Details like those are great and the fact that they were removed bugs me.

But even bigger than those, what makes Watchmen so fantastic is that there are a hundred characters and all of them are important to everything in a way, and all of these hundreds of threads come together so perfectly. The film gets rid of the dozens of interesting minor characters, and the ones they keep get their lines trimmed. Hell, even the main characters get shafted on their character development. Dr. Manhattan gets boosted to the front because of the CGI used to make him, the Silk Spectre/Silk Spectre II dynamic is pushed aside, the original Minutemen are all but forgotten, Nite Owl's struggle is not shown but told in boringly blatant terms, and Rorschach, the most attractive and morally immobile character in the story, has his interesting backstory cropped and his later scenes butchered.

And don't even get me started on the changed ending.

One of my favorite characters in the comics was Hollis Mason, the original Nite Owl. In the film he gets almost no screen time and his part isn't significant at all. This really upsets me because not only is he the one real, logical, reliable guy from the Minutemen, but he also published the book Under the Hood, which is the source of all the history, and his take on it is so unique. Another opportunity wasted.

The writers of the script squandered so much great material and now I can understand why Alan Moore wanted nothing to do with the film, and refuses to see it.

This rant is already longer than I intended. I will write in more detail as more people see the film. But honestly, if you have not read the original graphic novel, you must. It is so, so superior to this film in every way. Do yourself a favor. Trust me on this one.

Rating: 4/7

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Make Me a Supermodel

The new season of Bravo's show Make Me A Supermodel premiered tonight.

Last season had one of the cutest winners ever, and I got sucked in to the show before the finale. I guess now I'll watch the whole thing.

Immediate favorite was Jordan. She's cute and seems kind of nerdy, so she was an instant favorite. And then she won the first challenge and has immunity next week, so there we go! Also, I like Colin, because he's also kind of nerdy and the underdog.

Tyson Beckford is the worst host ever, BTW. The new girl Nicole or whatever is all right. It's odd though how Tyson isn't a judge, but also how the judges decide, instead of America calling in to vote like last season. It seems better this way, though.

Here's to a new season of reality tv!

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Updating the Top 50

With another year over, I have a new slew of films to ponder. Then again, aren't we always pondering good films? Either way, I've read over my previous Top 50 and it needs some serious updates. This year I don't think I'll do as elaborate a countdown. We'll see. Anyway, here's the old Top 50.

1. American Beauty
2. All About Eve
3. It's a Wonderful Life
4. Annie Hall
5. The Godfather
6. Some Like It Hot
7. The Princess Bride
8. Mulholland Dr.
9. Amelie
10. The Shawshank Redemption
11. Sunset Blvd.
12. Match Point
13. A Streetcar Named Desire
14. Casablanca
15. A Shot in the Dark
16. Spirited Away
17. Dr. Strangelove
18. The Departed
19. Lilo & Stitch
20. Zodiac
21. Psycho
22. Clue
23. Finding Nemo
24. Breakfast at Tiffany's
25. The Diving Bell and the Butterfly
26. The Shining
27. Gone With the Wind
28. Chinatown
29. Love Actually
30. City Lights
31. Fargo
32. Traffic
33. The Producers
34. Bridget Jones's Diary
35. Chocolat
36. The Godfather: Part II
37. Mean Girls
38. The Apartment
39. Pulp Fiction
40. Halloween
41. Blazing Saddles
42. How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
43. Bonnie and Clyde
44. Shakespeare in Love
45. Army of Darkness
46. This Is Spinal Tap
47. Jerry Maguire
48. Sabrina
49. Schindler's List
50. As Good As It Gets

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